the wishbone murders

Follow @ameliasauter on Twitter

• I found myself oversharing with the cashier so he knew it was just for my tailbone. #embarrassingpurchase http://t.co/gNcZlOtJ 3 months ago
• I'm having intrusive memories today of the years that I ate seitan logs for Thanksgiving instead of turkey. #traumaticflashbacks 6 months ago
• RT @feliciaslounge: Seriously, we’re going to need to drink to get through this election. In fact, I think I need to start right now. 6 months ago
• Two hours behind the bar is the equivalent of two hours at the gym, plus I get to have a dirty martini. #workout 6 months ago
• Can't buy a good Halloween candy to hand out or I'll eat it all. Can't buy a bad one or we get labeled a lame house. #candydilemma 6 months ago